Saikin Nihon ni kimashita (I recently came to Japan)
The wormhole experience of our coming to Japan
This year has been all kinds of things, more kinds of things BY FAR than any other year so far in my life... I have some of the biggest challenges at work, challenging health issues, I moved in with and got married to the love of my life, I enrolled in coaching classes outside of work, I started working on the side, we had our reception and friends and family in town for two weeks, to name a few. Not to mention the people around us - we had a huge gas explosion in our neighborhood, we lost friends to a tragic incident, my sister in law had her house destroyed by a fire, and a friend of mine was hit by a car on her bicycle and fairly seriously injured.
In May, Justin and I had a fairytale wedding on Lummi Island (San Juan Islands, Washington). This was followed by our fairytale honeymoon in French Polynesia. The week we returned from our honeymoon, a friend passed along the word to Justin about possibly working in Japan. The first thought in my head was something along the lines of, "HA! You've gotta be kidding me. The first day life has slowed from a blur... An appropriately-timed proposal. No way, I JUST started to enjoy feeling settled with roots a few inches deep..." I have had "willing to relocate internationally" on my resume for my entire career and had just deleted it earlier this year. Well, that is how life works, isn't it?
Our friend suggested the idea in May and until August we were discussing, interviewing, waiting to hear back, interviewing again, attending a job fair. Three months is a long time to envision throwing all of our chips in the air and pondering where they'll land - all while keeping it secret from everyone we know. Not just throwing our chips in the air, but falling in love with again and realizing the very dream we had written off in favor of saving for a house in Seattle as time is marching on - I am 34, Justin is 32. I think I can speak for the both of us, that moving to Japan would be fulfilling our wildest dreams.
I have had many sleepless nights filled with thoughts of what it would be like to live in Japan. Laying awake previewing books online about Japan - "Rice, Noodle, Fish" really got me jazzed up. Marveling about how much the cultural values which I read about are in line with the values I hold dear and are often at odds with American society.... Could this be a perfect match? How had Japan been off my radar until now? August clear through October we had committed and were waiting on our visas. We had arrived at OUR conclusion - we wanted to go. We enjoyed searching for apartments online, savoring wine-fueled conversations of "what will it be like", fully realizing it may be yanked back from us if something falls through with the visas, although that was doubtful. I became aware of how intriguing it felt to have a ribbon or river of memories flowing behind me - and where I could typically turn the opposite direction and see or imagine the familiar future, a black hole or black box was approaching. The only time this happened before was going to Asia on my first (backpacking trip). I couldn't so much as imagine or predict how I'd fit in, how I'd feel, what I would love, what would wear on me. I find that feeling incredibly addicting.
A very rushed selfie in our empty condo before going to the airport. This was our first home together and I felt really sentimental leaving it - all empty and running out the door felt so weird.
We gave our notices in sync - we are in the same industry and the gossip pipelines are strong. Three days later we had received notice that the Japanese government had approved our "CoE." We. Were. Going. We. Were.. GOING TO JAPAN! All that remained was formalities. The next day we would head with our passports to the Japanese consulate and get the final paperwork buttoned up.
For the love of leaping
Nothing about me suggests I would like what we just did. I am indecisive, I am fairly risk-averse, I like to be in control, I don't like to be the center of attention, I am not a fan of chaos. And yet NOTHING makes me feel more alive than walking away from all that is familiar and throwing myself into somewhere new and different and farrrrr away. Nothing makes my skin literally tingle with excitement and feel just as giddy as when I was a child having been told we were going to Grandma's to go swimming. I distinctly remember leaping so high out of pure joy I could have hit the ceiling. Looking at a place on the other side of the globe, thinking Justin and I are going to be THERE. US. THERE.
Throughout this whole process I have been sitting back and observing how Justin handles it. I know not everyone is the same as me. I was waiting to see a feather ruffle or a bit of fear or doubt. I have been through something somewhat comparable with my previous trip. Justin had not yet been to Asia. Dropping everything and reappearing to live on the other side of the globe is a big deal. All I saw was Justin buckle down and take charge and walk into what felt like a worm hole with me. Never did he look back. Riding RSVP (maybe around a hundred hours on road bikes together, training and then riding from Seattle to Vancouver, Canada) when we first met elevated us to another level that I knew we were good together and we had something that really worked. Watching Justin go through moving to Japan is just the cherry and the sprinkles on top of our first year of marriage. I know even more we are in for a lifetime of good stuff!
Justin driving us to SeaTac on the morning of October 18th. For the past few months we'd exchange wide-eyed smiles periodically thinking, "Are we really doing this?" This is the day the smiles say, "We ARE really doing this. HOLY shit..." "Life is a highway! ..."
I had grown accustomed to my work - enjoying the feeling of having mostly mastered my tasks and the familiarity of my routine. I had enjoyed this feeling after 10 years of straight change and a huge learning curve at work and through school. But, I came to need a change of scenery. I was growing stale and kind of grumpy to be honest. I think I can say the same for Justin, in his own way. I longed for that spine-shiver and blood sizzling excitement like I got when I read an email from my friend Bill Harrison about visiting Everest Basecamp. Nearly 5 years ago to the day (October 13th, 2011), I had sold everything I own and left with a backpack for Asia with no return ticket. October 18th, 2016 I am doing the same damn thing, over again. Only this time in business class, with my husband and best friend in the world. Life is GOOD! I gotta marvel at the round time intervals of my "cosmic clock." I don't know how I ever got so DAMN lucky.
Minefield of pleasant surprises
Landing in Japan has got me realizing my patterns of operating through big changes. I take assumptions I have built through experiences over the past 5 or 10 years, tense all the muscles in my body, squeeze my eyes shut, grit my teeth and prepare for... (silence). I sneak a little peak around by opening one eye slightly. Arriving in Japan and the last two weeks I have felt like Dorothy when her house has been dropped by the tornado in "The Wizard of Oz." I am that much taller than everyone here. Kidding! Seriously, it feels like wonderland.
To be continued....
Until then, here are some photos from the trip over.
This is the very first sight I have EVER had of Japan out the window. The second place I have moved sight unseen! (The first was Seattle in 2009).
